"It was the night before new year's
and the weather grew mean.
It was 3:00 in the morning
and I was stranded in queens."
"The tavern grew empty,
the gas lights grew dim."
"The horse-drawn carriages
were all but snowed in..."
"Last call was approaching
and my fortunes looked bleak."
"Then I turned to my left
and stifled a shriek."
"She had a peach fuzz beard
and weighed 16 stone."
"She gobbled up hot wings
and swallowed the bones."
"I muffled a scream
and threw up in my mouth."
I asked, "Where do you live?"
And she said,
"One block south."
"I swallowed my pride
and six shots of whiskey."
"And prayed to the gods
that she wasn't too frisky."
"Back in her cave,
she prepared us a snack."
"Neath her mighty hooves,
the floorboards did crack."
"But when she returned,
she found a sound sleeper.
"And thus she became
the Sexless Innkeeper."
[Taken from HIMYM Season 5]
I started loving it from the very first time I listened to it. Plus, the video is so wonderfully made, it makes you roll with laughter. Now coming to what actually is "The Sexless Inkeeper". When you plan getting laid by offering someone shelter but instead she trolls you by just sleeping and snorting.
Or in a broader perspective it may also mean that "using" a person in return of a hypothetical sexual favor. It's kind of gross both ways. If you take sexual favor it is gross on your side, and if you give sexual favor, it is gross on your side too. It is common pretty much common these days and we guys often become a victim of being "The Sexless Inkeeper".
Let's learn a way how to turn these life lemons into lemonade.
"It was the night before this one,
I had hours to kill.
I sat in the tavern,
grading parchments with quill."
"A busty, young lassie
flashed me a grin.
Her garb said "classy",
but her eyes whispered "sin".
She said, "You're a teacher?"
I said, "Yes, indeed".
"I must have you", she moaned.
"I'm turned on by tweed".
With haste we did scamper
to my chamber anon.
We fell to the couch,
and, bro, it was on.
I unlaced her bodice.
Our passions grew deeper.
And thus ends the tale
f the Sexless Innkeeper."
and the weather grew mean.
It was 3:00 in the morning
and I was stranded in queens."
"The tavern grew empty,
the gas lights grew dim."
"The horse-drawn carriages
were all but snowed in..."
"Last call was approaching
and my fortunes looked bleak."
"Then I turned to my left
and stifled a shriek."
"She had a peach fuzz beard
and weighed 16 stone."
"She gobbled up hot wings
and swallowed the bones."
"I muffled a scream
and threw up in my mouth."
I asked, "Where do you live?"
And she said,
"One block south."
"I swallowed my pride
and six shots of whiskey."
"And prayed to the gods
that she wasn't too frisky."
"Back in her cave,
she prepared us a snack."
"Neath her mighty hooves,
the floorboards did crack."
"But when she returned,
she found a sound sleeper.
"And thus she became
the Sexless Innkeeper."
[Taken from HIMYM Season 5]
I started loving it from the very first time I listened to it. Plus, the video is so wonderfully made, it makes you roll with laughter. Now coming to what actually is "The Sexless Inkeeper". When you plan getting laid by offering someone shelter but instead she trolls you by just sleeping and snorting.
Or in a broader perspective it may also mean that "using" a person in return of a hypothetical sexual favor. It's kind of gross both ways. If you take sexual favor it is gross on your side, and if you give sexual favor, it is gross on your side too. It is common pretty much common these days and we guys often become a victim of being "The Sexless Inkeeper".
Let's learn a way how to turn these life lemons into lemonade.
"It was the night before this one,
I had hours to kill.
I sat in the tavern,
grading parchments with quill."
"A busty, young lassie
flashed me a grin.
Her garb said "classy",
but her eyes whispered "sin".
She said, "You're a teacher?"
I said, "Yes, indeed".
"I must have you", she moaned.
"I'm turned on by tweed".
With haste we did scamper
to my chamber anon.
We fell to the couch,
and, bro, it was on.
I unlaced her bodice.
Our passions grew deeper.
And thus ends the tale
f the Sexless Innkeeper."
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